21DF Day 9 (Dec 9 2010)

So Grateful to be working from home. Allows me to just clear my schedule & work slowly, very slowly, depending on how i feel. I get to wake up late, if i need. Take afternoon naps, when i start to feel weak. Hmmm, what a blessing.

This whole year has been blessings after blessings. And honestly i feel a big part of it is because LC prayed for us in his 2010 Bootcamp Fast, way before i understood what fasting was about.

It's a miracle to be able to take the whole year off. I never thought things like this were possible until i got saved :) :). God makes the impossible, POSSIBLE! So much unbelievable things (miracles, blessings) have happened since my walk with Jesus, some so personal, i am not there yet to share, but i know are my testimonies. Things that even telling people, just wont make sense. Honestly, even to me, they still don't make sense & seem real. Oh the Lord saves for sure :). It is a gift. And i am excited to have been blessed to share with others how they can experience this too :).

Based on their conditioning & conclusions, we have all created beliefs we live by. It's not anyone's place to tell someone's beliefs are right or wrong. It's up to them to ask themselves if their beliefs are empowering or dis-empowering. Consequently, Everyone has a choice to practice a religion/lifestyle of their liking.

Hey, perhaps one can say this "God" thing is crazy but all i know is, i don't spend days depressed anymore.  My bond of depression has been broken. I don't spend days worrying about how my needs will be met. I don't spend days just surviving. I dont live in fear anymore. God took away my fear & gave me Faith.

All i know is, the parts that i struggle with, God continues to work in me and he will not stop until it is complete. All i know the bond of fornication has been broken. All i know is the bond of Food Addiction & Over-eating has been broken.  

All i know is my heart desires to do good. I find fulfillment in my work & God is leading me on how to make it my source of income so i dont have to work 9-5 in something i have no passion for. All i know is i feel a sense of peace, completeness that does not comes from affirmations or pumping myself each morning, but from a source within, that i can't even describe.

All i know is the path i was heading was leading me to destruction; debt, monthly money struggles, job un-satisfaction, unwanted pregnancies, marriage with the wrong man, covering what was going on inside with material possessions that i couldn't even afford.

Loneliness, depression, un-forgiveness, jealousy, sloth, anger BUT, God rescued me from all that and put me on the right path to living a meaningful & fulfilling destiny. I have an excitement to experience the fullness of being a child of God, a woman, a wife, a mummy.

It isn't that my life is perfect now & i don't need to be. But it's that before i was dead. Now i have something worth living for. To defend & preach the gospel Good News. Something worth fighting for. .. Now i am back on track! GLORY BE TO GOD! :)

Whether you believe in this "God" or not. Even though i may not have the deepest understanding or have a justifiable answer for you if he exists or not. Even though you may have these great scientific view that prove he doesn't exists, all i know is so far, i am getting results. So far this belief/lifestyle is working for me & so many others i know. All i can say is, YOU WILL SEE IT WHEN YOU BELIEVE IT!

A little detour there guys;
A little weak throughout the day esp after taking my shower.
Definitely no hunger pains, no food temptations (although now my other room-mate is on to making omlettes, hmmm the smell of cooking eggs with spring onions & peppers, i can almost taste it, lol. No worries, i am going to make lots of eggs on Dec 28 :).)

The funny thing though is we crave all these foods in the fast, but once fast is broken, the cravings are gone. For me actually, my body goes back to its normal eating routine, quinoa porridge with berries (yummy), grains, beans etc.

Powerful morning prayer, believe it's what gave me great results from my Ministry goals.
Read word early in the morning, hmm, no much meditation, working on that :), lol.
Not drinking much water, i should really be drinking quite a lot. Pushing myself to try & make 2litres, have to!

Thanks LC for the inspiration text.
Thanks EKL for your support :).
That's it for today guys.

PS- NO FOOD TEMPTATIONS AT NIGHT! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) GBTG.

Love you all :)

NicaKan, Paradigm Shifter
Toronto, Canada
Program: L.A.C.I`s Spiritual Empowerment Program 
(21DF Boot Camp:2011 Goals)